After reading a blog post by Anna at http://justajesusfollower.com, I started praying for my pastor.
I’ve struggled a lot lately. I don’t sit well under his authority for the time being. At first, when I started attending the church, I would hang onto his every word. He spoke with conviction and authority. Then the more I attended the church, the more I became agitated at the constant berating of those in the prosperity gospel movement. Now I understand that this movement is an incorrect interpretation of the life-saving gospel message, but I also want to love these individuals. Aren’t there some aspects of my theology that are erroneous. Can’t I extend some mercy to these people? Surely I’d want the same grace bestowed upon me when I am flawed. Yes, I want to be corrected, but I want to be loved at the same time. If I want this, I need to love my pastor in a graceful and merciful manner too. We are all sinners falling short of God’s glory. I’m not better than him and vice versa.
[Which Daddy, I’m sorry I disrespected you the other day. I was telling my boss about my interaction with you and he made some points I didn’t want to hear, but needed to. I know I need to respect you even if I want to disregard your unwarranted advice and opinions. I don’t need to lash out at you like a toddler, or rather an emotionally charged, hormonal pregnant lady (which I am, but doesn’t afford an excuse at the fact that mistreated you). I know I need to do the same (i.e. treat respectfully) with my pastor in my thought life, discussions with others, and prayer life.]
Anyways, a disjointed poem came to mind:
Ashes, ashes we all fall down
Only to rise into beauty
when charcoal stained paths
are drenched with salted repentance
and ruby acceptance.
Now I grant you the throne of my heart; reign,
Make this prideful spirit into dust
and turn me to humble ascension
as you are glorified in and through this urn.