The Big Bang Theory.
The first season was phenomenal. It was saturated with science jokes and nerdy people enjoyed it. We finally had a TV show that epitomized the awkwardness that is found in a geek. We were proud of it. Then it continued…subsequent season worsening as the show progressed. It is still a funny show and enjoyable to watch, but it has deviated from the intellectual jokes into the typical monotonous sitcom which just is a series of sexual innuendos.
The most recent episode was a capstone to Sheldon and Amy’s relationship, but also the usual fare of sexual media.
I was excited for them but also deeply grieved. Yes, they finally consecrated their relationship, but is sex the ultimate achievement in a relationship? I don’t think so. Is sex wonderful? Yes, it is. However, there is so much more richness to a relationship than physical intimacy.
We saw the episode where Sheldon had a ring he was going to use to propose to Amy. The ring hasn’t been mentioned since. Why didn’t he propose marriage for her birthday rather than sex? Marriage is a greater commitment. Sex is a big commitment but it is exercised so flippantly in today’s culture, I wonder if it has any substantial value nowadays.
It seems we will share our bodies before, if at all, we share our financial resources, emotions (heartaches, joys, etc.), histories, and heritage. Why?
Isn’t it greater to commit your life to someone? Why couldn’t Sheldon have married Amy as was originally brought up? Why did it have to be sex first?
We live in a culture where pre-marital sex is high. It is claimed that you’ll be able to see if that partner is physically suited to you. Shouldn’t you have a physical attraction and you’ll be able to navigate the waters of increased intimacy after making a commitment to each other? The beauty of sex in marriage and remaining faithful are the hiccups, the “figuring each other out” bit. Individuals also live together prior to marriage thinking it’ll help them see if they want to stay together. Deciding to stick it out, in spite of differences, is incredible. Yes, there are times when certain relationships should be dissolved. (Abuse and Adultery for instance.)
I’ll give a scenario of why intimacy doesn’t necessarily equate to compatibility. In college, I had my first love. My husband, Frank, knows that I had other boyfriends. He knows that Jared was my first love. Jared was a great kisser and we were passionate with one another. However, we fought ALL the time. We were definitely physically attracted and compatible in the sex department (no, we did not engage in intercourse, not that it needs to be said on social media…we were just really attracted to one another and this was not an area we had issues with). If I had physical relations with him, it wouldn’t have revealed the flaws in our relationship. It would have just left me more broken when we realized we weren’t going to work out.
My husband, Frank, on the other hand was not a good kisser initially. (In high school, I had broken off relationships if the guy was a bad kisser.) It was sloppy. Yet, there was something about this man. Frank had a gentle and quiet heart. He was willing to buy me dinners, share money, talk about our struggles, comfort me with a really personal obstacle, and we enjoyed similar activities. Over time, Frank became a better kisser. We learned each other. Our compatibility is incredibly strong, but physical intimacy didn’t need to be initiated to reveal that. In fact, if we made the decision based solely on initial physical intimacy, we would have missed the incredible marriage we have today because we would have thought we weren’t right for one another. We are perfect for each other though. Frank is my best friend. Yes, we are lovers, but he is so much more than that. Also, if there ever came a point where we couldn’t engage in coitus, we know we have a deeper relationship and we’d stay together because our commitment to each other means more than physical play.
Sheldon and Amy had a relationship that seemed deeper than their counterparts. They shared intellectual stimulation and enjoyed each others company without needing to engage in sex. Now this is what they’ll talk about with their friends. It grieves me.
When will our culture start conversations that don’t result in sex talk? I don’t know. I pray that I’ll stray from cultural norms and begin to hold conversations of more substantial merit. Now, this isn’t to say we should be prudish. We should discuss sexual matters in a mature fashion.
However, can we admit that there is more to life than sex? Those things should be talked about and enjoyed just as much, if not more than sex.
May the New Year bring conversations, media, and other activities that are oriented around other topics besides sex!
Happy New Year’s Eve All.