Impatience

I have yet another cold.  Thankfully it has been slow at work and I’ve been able to retire home early and nap in the afternoon.  The cough lingers but my congestion is clearing.  Onions seem to assist in this process.  (Onions apparently absorb the bad germs and can help prevent/shorten the duration of colds.)

I know I should give the cliche response that prayer has helped.  Sure it can soothe my soul, but my head has been in such a fog lately.  I find it hard to focus on Scripture, let alone prayer.  When I do pray it has been asking God to cure me so I could serve him better.

Then last night Frank and I read Isaiah 5.  We started it Isaiah at the onset of Advent.  We missed a couple of nights.  Last night it seemed fitting that we should read that text though.  God spoke to my heart in verses 18-19.

I often urge God to hurry- be it in curing a cold, answering my requests, or following my expectations.  Last night’s devotions struck me, especially because I’ve been so restless throughout my pregnancy.  I’ve only really prayed to have this cold end.  Yet in my urgency all I feel is woe.

It is when I stop, trust, and rest in his timing, his healing, and his presence that I find peace for all situations.  I am able to withstand trial when I simply seek him.  His strength is made perfect in my weakness when I stop letting my impatience interfere.

A New Year’s resolve is to stop the complaining, to stop ushering my will above my Savior’s, and to give him the gift of worship as is befitting to the Lord.  What a treasure it is to surrender this will around Epiphany.  I bring him the gift of self and pray that I might continue to do so in earnest and with fervor.

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