Shallow Button

Another pregnancy oddity that frightens me is the shift from an concave bellybutton to a convex bellybutton. Yes, the in vs. out shape. An “outie” has always somewhat disgusted me, like back hair. I don’t know why and perhaps it is a slight shallowness on my part. I do apologize. It’s not that I have something against people who have those traits, I’m just a bit disturbed by them. I know it’s weird. Those traits are less of an oddity than my repulsion.

Anyways, I don’t want an “outie”. For one, I had gallbladder surgery when I was in my early 20s and I fear that the scar will tear slightly. I know it won’t. I’m sure they account for that when stitching a person back up.

I hope our kids don’t have an outward bellybutton. I also hope our kids don’t have red hair (which would only happen if both Frank and I carry a recessive trait) because my mother might treat them differently. Yeah she dislikes redheads. It’s strange. I guess that’s why I haven’t ever had an attraction to redheads—I know if I brought him home to Mom she’d scowl.

I guess we all have affinities for certain traits and are disgusted by others. It is not that we’d treat someone with those characteristics differently, it just means we see it through evolutionary lenses as survival in our tribe. That is the best explanation I can give, other than I’m just shallow and I should apologize and repent, asking God to have me like those features.

I have to come to terms that when I am pregnant I might have a convex bellybutton for a while. I even dreamed of it last night…a stupid nightmare in my mind. Oh well, if having the joy of a kid means having to deal with increased hair growth and a protruding bellybutton I guess I can come to live with it.

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