Okay sorry for the play on words there. I hate those bracelets. It is to raise awareness about breast cancer, but I don’t think it is the most effective way to do it.

Anyways, that is another concern. I have rampant breast cancer in my family. Will I contract it? Will my children? (If I do contract it at least that puts me at a higher probability of passing before Frank.) Maybe they’ll start to have cures for the disease by the time we have kids.

So I did not intend for this post to be about cancer; although fearing diseases and a child dying at a young age is certainly a grave fear. Tuesday night, because natural child birth and child rearing is an interest of mine, we watched a documentary about breastfeeding. The documentary was a great expose about breast milk. It followed the lives of 4-5 women and their aspirations, fears, and goals for breastfeeding. Some women really wanted to breast feed and couldn’t. Another thought she might use formula but had so much milk she also helped to donate the milk. A lesbian couple actually taught their adopted infant how to nurse on their breasts (apparently you don’t need to be pregnant to breast feed, you just have to put an infant close and try to nurse repeatedly until you produce milk; I guess there are even a few men who have been able to lactate (movie mentioned that there were cases)).

I love sleep. It takes time at night to breast feed—a few hours throughout the night even. Will I cave to formula because I’ll be too grouchy from the lack of sleep? Will I produce enough milk? If I pump too often so Frank can help with night feedings will I produce less milk? Will I produce enough milk (I haven’t even been able to conceive within 3 years while having continuous unprotected sex and we have been trying for a kid)? What will our sex life look like when I am lactating, will I let my breasts be an erogenous zone or not? How will I take criticisms of breastfeeding in public?

Boobs were designed as a means to provide food for kids. I’ve always known that. Why does society seem to say that they are equivalent to the penis and are simply for sexual pleasure? Why do we not seem to understand biology and the basic purposes of our body (yes to glorify God, but more so the biology…we over-spiritualize our bodies at times and thus say we must control the lactating breast when it is really just a food source). Did I even make sense in that last sentence? I don’t know if I did. Sorry. (Oh and that nasty habit—hopefully our kids don’t pick that up!)

Yeah so that’s another fear to add to this never-ending list—breast feeding and its possible complications.

For more information about the documentary visit: http://breastmilkthemovie.com/themovie.html


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